Christmas Returns

It is that time of year once again. You know, the special day when we commemorate the birth of Santa Claus. Well, not quite. Actually, December 25th was the day when Santa defeated the Nazis and, as an act of victory, invented electricity so that all of his followers could celebrate and pay homage by hanging miniature light bulbs on their houses. Oh Santa, how great thou art!
There is another, lesser known version of the story that involves a Jewish guy who just couldn't play by the rules, but few people know about that. Actually, it is unfortunate how few of those ubiquitous mall-goers maxing out their visas on over-priced plastic bobbles DO know (or care) about the significance of the holiday season. Christmas, though it is now devoted to the birth of Jesus Christ, has ties to very unchristian holidays.
For one, Jesus was almost certainly not born in winter, but rather sometime in the summer, when Mary and big Joe would have been making the trip to Jerusalem for the census. Before this ever happened though, several solar deities from Persia, Syria, and other parts of the middle east were collectively worshiped during Sol Invictus,which was in December during the winter solstice. Initially, during the first centuries after Christ there would have been no celebration of his birthday. Christian writers soon found it convenient to connect the birth of the sun to the birth of the son, and the rest is history.
Please don't misread my intentions: I am happily a christian and mean no insult to Jesus or his cause, but rather I wish to point out the facts of history, facts which indicate that even things as harshly divided as religion often flow into one another along a cultural continuum. With that said,the next time you are standing in line to purchase that Malibu Barbie (which will almost certainly give its owner a severely distorted self-image and equally tough eating disorder) as a gift for Christmas, take a moment to remember the man from Bethlehem and the all the pagans who came before him so that you might have one more annual excuse to eat too much and spend time with those you love.